In 9th grade I had the coolest math teacher; this young guy who wore jeans and boots and looked so hip to our young, pubescent psyches. When we came back from the holidays though to start the second semester, we learned Mr. Cool was gone and some old guy, straight out of a nerd catalog, would be our new teacher. He wore glasses and was balding, but ironically had the bushiest eyebrows and long hairs growing out of his nose and ears. And the white shirts he wore always had red ink stains under the pockets because he’d forget to cap his leaky pens.Behind his back (we thought) we teased and taunted him mercilessly. He was such a contrast to our first teacher and although I don’t remember Mr Cool’s real name, I do remember the substitute’s; Mr. Cochran. One day, after weeks of putting up with our taunting and abuse, he pulled me aside after class. He asked why we were so mean to him, someone who was simply doing the best he knew how given the situation? I had no answer and I felt terrible. At that moment I was able to look past the nose hairs and huge eyebrows and see the person who had dedicated his life to teaching a subject he loved. His influence helped me become a bit less judgmental, a lesson I’m still learning.
While we all hear a lot about influencer marketing these days, but the truth is, we are all influencers to others whether we realize it or not. If you’re a parent, you’re teaching and influencing your kids 24/7. Salespeople work to influence customers to purchase their products or services. Teachers, doctors, dentists, CEO’s, customer service reps, preachers, politicians, marketers, talk show hosts, actors and almost every single one of us uses our influence each and every day with others whether we do it consciously or not.
Influence, by definition is the ability to alter or sway an individual’s or a group’s thoughts, beliefs, or actions. And while there are many ways we influence others every day and here are five of the most common:
Influence by example How we interact and communicate with those we come into contact with will influence them one way or another. You’ve heard the saying there is only one, first impression and that will determine how influential we are. Respectful, ethical, honest, authoritative communication will take you further than bullying, surliness, dishonesty and disrespect. Lead by example, by always being ready to jump in and get your hands dirty. If you sit on the sidelines and tell people how to do something, your influence will be negligible,
Influence by teaching Become an expert in your field through writing, the use of social media and perhaps speaking. People respect and are influenced by those who passionately and respectfully communicate their knowledge. Admitting when you are wrong and listening to other points-of-view will add to the influence you have with others. Mentoring is another way of teaching those just getting started with your knowledge and wisdom.
Influence by Listening Dale Carnegie, the famous speaker and motivator wrote a book called, “How to Win Friends and Influence People” that has sold 30 million copies. He encouraged people to be good listeners and encourage others to talk about themselves. As one of the most influential people of his time, Carnegie knew that letting others talk about their lives and interests builds rapport and trust, which over time helps influence others in a positive way.
Influence through appreciation Learn to be humble and to say thank you regularly. Showing appreciation influences other to do the same. Common courtesy has become less and less common as people think they can bully and push themselves on others. By showing appreciation you stand out as a positive influence and others will follow your lead.
Influence with your attitude Attitudes are infectious be they positive or negative. Use your positive attitude to influence others to do the same. People want to be around positive and successful people, not whiners and complainers. Having an attitude of gratitude will set the bar high for those around you to do the same.
Whether it’s influencing someone to go with you to your favorite restaurant or investing money in your newest invention, we all seek to influence others every day. Far from being evil, influence is a natural part of our social lives and one of the best ways to influence others is to be willing to walk in their shoes. So how do you influence others?
“You can never really live anyone else's life, not even your child's. The influence you exert is through your own life, and what you've become yourself.” Eleanor Roosevelt
Steve Woodburn started hustling early in life, landing his first on-air radio gig when he was just 20 and spending the next 20 years as a DJ, news anchor, talk show host and traffic reporter. He found the promotional products business totally by accident (as do most) working 29 years on the distributor side and five as a supplier. Steve won multiple sales awards along the way and volunteered his time with his local association, the Regional Association Council (RAC) and served on the PPAI Board of Directors. He's currently the Chief Adventurer of Marvelous Moosey Adventures, a company he and his wife created, and pursues acting, writing and voice-over work. Connect with Steve on Linkedin or via email at successnow09@gmail.com