The truth is that I don't think I’ve spent a dime on a political candidate's promotional merchandise since buying a Kinky Friedman T-shirt many, many years ago. In retrospect, the shirt I bought was prior to the Kinkster becoming a political gadfly… he was just a fun-loving musician back then. As such, my record remains intact.
With the presidential posturing already begun, it’s been fun scouring the various candidates' webpages to see what merchandise they've been selling. It goes without saying (so why bother, right?) that the prices shown have been amusing as well.
On his website, Donald Trump has already gotten some flak for selling headwear that may or may not be imported. The irony of that is that his slogan is "Make America Great Again"… and he might be selling imported hats. The fact that he knocked off Ronald Reagan's slogan may or may not also be ironic.
This, of course, from a man whose retail line of clothing was made in China. But I digress…
My own company, Keyfetch, participated in an RFP for the campaign for "the Jeb!" (their exclamation point, not mine); the candidate was to give our keytags with our Keyfetch return system on them. While we would have welcomed the order, the campaign might have been better served by finding a product that would help them locate lost supporters.
The Jeb! campaign store also featured one of the most notoriously funny pieces of promotional merchandise: the American-made $75 Guaca Bowle. The significance of that final "e," if there is one, is lost on me. Nevertheless, the website reads, "Jeb and Columba love whipping up guacamole on Sunday Funday. Now, you can get in on the act with this 'Guaca Bowle.' Jeb’s secret guacamole recipe not included… yet." In that I'm not really big on avocados, I'm thinking this candidate has lost my vote.
For $1,000 (let that sink in), the Rand Paul campaign will sell you a pocket-sized version of the United States Constitution which, as one punster from Ad Week wrote, can be downloaded off the internet for free. It's in a bound book, with what the candidate appears to have actually autographed. I'm guessing it's not a leather book, as that's not mentioned in the ad copy.
Or just send me a $1,000. My signature on anything is about as relevant to this campaign as, say, a guacamole bowl.
Personal politics aside, I have to admit that I do at least like Bernie Sanders' "Feel the Bern" slogan. No, that doesn't mean I'm going to fork over any money for his merchandise.
I read two different viewpoints on Hillary Clinton’s merchandise. Clair McLafferty of Ad Week wrote, "I'm all for not taking yourself too seriously. But the former Secretary of State's campaign website appears as though her PR team recruited a bunch of college kids, threw a kegger, and let them throw darts to determine which products made it into the shop." Guess we know to what base she's trying to appeal. Of that same merchandise collection, Joel Stein wrote in his Time column of 9/28/15, "Clinton's store makes her campaign, against all evidence, seem like fun. Her campaign's staff design director and senior designer have come up with a $30 pantsuit T-shirt, a $15 Grillary Clinton apron and a $55 throw pillow stitched with 'A woman’s place is in the White House.' In the gay-pride section of the store, there's a bright yellow 'Yaaas Hillary' T-shirt that features a photo of a young Clinton and a phrase that a Lady Gaga fan uses to express approval."
Guess we know to what base she's trying to appeal. Stein concluded his column by writing, "But the products aren't the real difference between (Trump) and the other candidates. It's the far more complicated work involved in getting those items to market. I have no doubt that with quality products like the $8 'Make America great again!' megaphone and the $12.50 set of 'Make America great again!' pom-poms, Trump's campaign will continue to do well. When politics becomes a business, a businessperson will win at politics."
You "buying" any of this?
Mike Schenker, MAS, is a promotional industry veteran and member of the Specialty Advertising Association of Greater New York (SAAGNY) Hall of Fame. He can be reached at mike@mikeschenker.com.